The 11th commandment

11^th commandment: He who sits on a pin shall rise … on the 3^rd second.

12^th commandment: Thou shalt embrace thy inner bitch

God: I don’t think I like that

Brigit: Well you got to move with the times dude! 2000 years and we’re stuck on just 10 commandments – that’s hardly progress! Besides I’m really tired of being a nice, good girl.

God:  Impertinence – thy name is Brigit. If I were anything like the way people make me out to be I would have zapped you to hell by now.

Brigit: You’re nothing like the church makes you out to be. That’s precisely why I hang around with you.

Get the jerk off!

So apparently there is a scientific reason for why I keep on attracting jerks into my life. Nope, it has nothing to do with me being a jerk – thank heavens!  (That was my last hypothesis), but rather akin to Pavlov’s experiment - its’ all about stimuli and response. According to this study, some people find a jerk attractive simply because his little gestures of affection are so infrequent and thereby more ‘valuable’.

Reminds me of this line by Douglas Coupland in the book ‘Life after God’

 “Yet how often is it that we are rescued by a stranger, if ever at all? And how is it that our lives can become drained of the possibility of forgiveness and kindness - so drained that even one small act of mercy becomes a potent lifelong memory? How do our lives reach these points?”

Ouch! Looks like it’s time to be kind to myself

Brigit: I never could understand why you loved David so much – he was a philanderer and a murderer. Wasn’t he the one who got Bathsheba’s husband killed so he could seduce her? Talk about a jerk of the first order.

God: David loved me. David loved life

Brigit: David was a jerk or were you the jerk?!

God: Well, to be human is to be a jerk at times. I guess some people might call me a jerk too;  After all, aren’t I the alpha, the omega the ultimate be all and end all of everything.

Brigit: I don’t understand all this. I just don’t want any more jerks in my life.

God: What you resist persists. What you accept transforms.

Gender Bender

Mary Magdalene was the woman Jesus loved the most. So the woman who celebrates all aspects of her femininity including her physical body and beauty is ‘good’ too and loved by God. That is so liberating!

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Brigit: Now why the heck didn’t you tell me this before?!

God: I did – you just weren’t listening. Guess you have to grow up and be a woman first to hear all my words

Brigit: Yup, will the real Brigit Jones please stand up?  The full Mr. and Mrs. of Brigit Jones

God: About time! Amen.